Being taken advantage of...

Friday, March 16, 2012 AnnMarie Brown 9 Comments

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On one hand I want to believe that people are good and that my worries and feelings are unfounded. That the willingness to do goodwill truly outweighs the instances of being taken advantage of. Recently I have found myself feeling resentful and used.

I know many people feel like they are being taken advantage for from time to time. It is one thing to feel like you are being taken advantage of and it is another thing to be told yes we know we are going to take advantage of you and for them to continue to do so. I thought that once people admitted wrong doing that they would try to correct it in a timely manner and not let it continue for months on end. Not only did they admit to it they admitted to it in front of many people and I watched many people nod in agreement that yes indeed they were taking advantage of this person and out of the group only ONE said well let's do something about this situation. ONE! I was there and I didn't say anything but that is because I was so hurt and angry that I knew if I spoke that the words would not be good. This person is a person I love and they would do anything for anyone.

Let's fast forward three weeks later and the situation is still the same. Now most would think there are many options in this situation but due to circumstances beyond our control there are not any options but two.. to quit and not be taken advantage of any further or to continue because that is the money they use to feed their family. Now do you see the options are very limited.

What do you do when you are being taken advantage of or feel like you are being taken advantage of? How do you balance not feeling taken advantage of and doing things for the sake of doing things and helping others? If you have advice on this situation that would be awesome too!


  1. Hmmm well I weigh it out, asking myself asking myself if it's worth my time...or should I just walk away. I've learned to say no to people and only help when I expect nothing in return...

  2. I think this is a really good subject/question. I find myself in a similar situation with a person/company that toots themselves as being dedicated in helping businesses and mompreneurs. Instead I'm finding hostility, back talk and condensending comments being poated on Twitter and FB by this person/organizaation (cyber bullying in my opinion) and don't understand why?? So what do you to in this case, I ask?

  3. @PetitsChefsAcaad

    Honestly... I think it is disgusting. Have you tried to confront them on this. I know for me that is my plan this week to confront the people doing this. I am calm enough to deal with the situation. It took me a while to calm down.

  4. Annie: I am stressed out for you. You know that lately I take margaritas words to heart. My friend @downshiftingpos says "time to put the big girl panties on" and honestly with that in mind I have rejected some unpaid jobs lately flat out. I have also stepped up my game and my professionalism. No more freebies. You and I both have a wealth of knowledge on social media. I was asked recently a couple of times to be an expert panelist on line at a well known twitter party. First time about one year ago I said yes without clarifying my end of payment. Afterwards I heard oh I am sorry we don't pay for that when in fact I know the owner of the t party takes in about $5,000 a party. So fast fwd
    To two weeks ago when multiple people and brands approached me for work and posts and articles. Busy busy time same person asked me to be expert panelist. I slapped my big girl panties in and said to be clear what is payment? I am extremely busy and my blog and my time is limited. They said oh we don't pay when it is this particular client. I said sorry then I have to decline. I am too busy. Please keep me in mind for paying jobs.

    Honestly since I employed this attitude I have been getting more paid jobs than ever.

    So big girl panties!!! You are worth it!

    Paula Schuck

  5. @Paula Schuck

    Thanks Paula... girl I love ya... I have to buy some big girl panties!!! :)

  6. I would take a little but of time to calm down, and write out an action plan on how I would like the situation to evolve and what the outcome should be. Then I would start taking steps to make it happen - talking to involved parties etc.
    Hope it all works out in the end!

  7. Hun, know your value and stick by it. I agree with Paula. Put those big girl panties on and stick to what you believe it. Sometimes it doesn't take an army. Call a spade a spade and see how you will flourish because of it!

  8. Trina said it right. stick to your guns and don't let anyone get away with that crap. If no one is going to call them on the carpet... let it be you. Someone's gotta keep the moral standards up.

  9. We recently got emails that were attacking, horrible and bad mouthing us on twitter and facebook from an advertiser who paid for the year. All because nofollow was used. Our policies are clear, though I am going to re-write them to include paid posts something on that matter so those reaching out understand we don't work for free. I recently started sending our policy out as a link in emails to verify they read it before asking us to blog stuff. It's not easy especially when the big girl panties are on and you still get refused. But hold to your guns. You are worth it!